Elton Welsby's Big Match.

Well, of course, Britain's second most famous Elton won't be at TOSC on Saturday, but its a massive game for both clubs and supporters alike.

Bognor Regis Town, the visitors, need a win to guarantee promotion back to the Ryman League Premier Division. Chatham need to win and hope for other results to go there way to avoid the purgatory that is a summer's wait to see if we're reprieved from the hellish waters of the Kent League.

Chatham have had no luck all season. Kevin Watson's come in to run the show for the last two games, and in fact scored an injury time winner on Saturday to complete a 3-2 comeback and keep the improbable dream alive. What chances a Chatham win on Saturday? Bognor are clearly a very good side, and will be bringing at least two coach loads of supporters with them on Saturday. They're in party mood. Let's hope they still go up, but only because Met Police lose. We are capable of beating them if we play with all our hearts on Saturday - what we lack in skill, we need to make up for in fight. I have a bizarre feeling that we actually have a chance of pulling off the great escape.

There is a chance of osmething very strange happening and that is this. Picture the scenrio. Chatham win 2-1. Cornithian Casuals are held 0-0 at Whitstable, and Whyteleafe win at home to relegated Horsham YMCA. This leaves the Chatham and Co-Cas with identical records, in every respect. It then goes to a head to head - these are equal too, both teams having won once, and both having scored and conceded two. This means a play off at a neutral venue - I don't think its ever been needed before, but there's an admittedly slim chance that the game on Saturday won't be our last of the season... stranger things have happened.

Medway 3 - 2 Thames

A late report this, and a little scant on detail, but Chatham started the improbable dream on Saturday with a 3-2 win over Neil Shipperley's Walton Casuals at TOSC. Chatham were actually at times very good.

The big news was that Paul Foley finally quit on Thursday, and Kevin Watson has taken over for the impossible dream. He certainly worked some magic, and a Chatham side that could name just three subs, including Watson, looked likely to struggle when first half injuries to Ibermere and Shinners saw youth players Kane Packer and Charlie Ticehurst come on. Both of them made a huge difference, combining with Ryan Laker who was played in midfield, and a rejuvenated Joe Fuller to launch pacy attacks at the Walton defence.

Chatham are five points adrift of safety with just two games remaining after Corinthian Casuals lost 6-0 at Whitehawk. This can still happen - away to Eastbourne this afternoon, we might find out that actually we're stuffed, but hope is a wonderful thing. You just never know in football...

Three cup finals and a local election

I said before we had loads of cup finals left. We've won none of them, and now are 8 points adrift of safety with three to play.





Safety is a strange term at the bottom of the pyramid. What it actually means is a summer of anxiety, wondering whether we'll be reprieved or not. We should be, as six teams have either gone to the wall or sought voluntary demotion, but its not a given. The Kent Premier League will be light on teams next year, and the FA are under pressure to strengthen it. We'll have an anxious summer, but should be OK. The most likely outcome is that we're moved to the Ryman 1 North. Again. It might all come to nothing though. We need to win our last three, including a final game of the season against Bognor Regis, who might need a win to secure the title and automatic promotion to the Ryman Premier. And we need Corinthian Casuals to lose all three of their games, two of which are against Whitehawk and Met Police, who are in the top four. Its not an impossible dream, but more of an improbable one. But it could all be decided if the results don't go our way on Saturday when we entertain Neil "Place of birth: Chatham" Shipperley and his Walton Casuals side at TOSC. They've been in poor form of late, so the improbable dream lives on.





And of course, there are nearly four months without football to wait on as of one week's time. Our season will end on 30th April 2011, so the blog will need new direction. I may turn my writing to the subject of politics and other dirge that springs to mind. I once wrote a review of a bad Richard Gere film in protest at the Chats. Maybe the comedic goings on at Medway Council's Gun Wharf will fill some space. So I'll start here.





May 5th sees a full council election. Standing again are Mark Reckless and Rehman Chishti, both Tory MPs as well as councillors. I can't help but wonder what happens, if, as expected, the council is tighter this year than ever before, and they need to vote at Gun Wharf and Westminster at the same time.

Additionally, it will be tight this year as the Conservatives have to an extent done their own legs with some, to be blunt, woefully poor administration on their watch.





Bias? Yes, of course I am. I am a nailed to the mast Labour supporter. I'd rather have an economist (Brown) run the country than an advertising executive (Cameron). In fact the only advertising exec I'd have run the country would be Don Draper. But he's fictional, and if he was real, would be dead.





Realistic? I believe so. Let's look at the mess the Tories have made here in Medway. Its a story made from incompetence, arrogance and self-service not seen this side of Liverpool since the 80s. Let's take a look at the evidence..

• The botched regeneration of Chatham, particularly the disgraceful state of the town centre's roads. Public opinion said "Don't do it - you'll kill the town". They did it. The town is dying.




• The destruction of important local heritage; the theatre royal (ropey for years, conveniently unsafe when the flyover needed to come down and the buses couldn't get anywhere); the Aveling and Porter building, now an unnecessary Strood car park (but the land value has soared), and the remains of the Jezreels site gone for good. At what price progress? What progress?

• A Conservative Councillor, Nick Brice who was cautioned for trying to procure the services of a prostitute, who continues despite his expulsion from the party, to vote with the Whip, and refused to resign his post. This may seem wafty, but its a disgrace. Prostitutes are amongst the most vulnerable in our town. They are more often than not the victims of vile men and the drug trade. They often have substance misuse problems, and mental health problems. A councillor should not be perpetuating the cycle of abuse.
http://democracy.medway.gov.uk/mgConvert2PDF.aspx?ID=6329



• A Conservative Councillor, Jane Chitty, found by the Standards Committee (they oversee our councillors in relation to obeying the members' code of conduct) to have publicly humiliated a council employee, by shouting and gesticulating at her in a public area of the Council's offices. Chitty has been ordered to apologise to the employee (who worked in a paid role for the Labour group), but spent 40 minutes at the hearing defending her actions, and not apologising. Interestingly, she thinks the incident happened at a different time to both the victim and an independent witness. The arrogance says everything we need to know about our local Conservative party. http://democracy.medway.gov.uk/mgAi.aspx?ID=4441

• The preference of the rich over the Town's poorest: Residents of Twydall, of which I am one, were heavily consulted on a far ranging road safety scheme for the ward, for which half of the cost would be met by the charity Sustrans. Tens of thousands were spent on this exercise, which was dropped when the ConDems cut budgets. The total cost to Medway would have been £330k. Too much we're told. Medway Council still managed to fund one major road safety scheme in the Towns this year (at over £130k). In Hempstead, the Town's wealthiest ward. And funnily enough, the safe seat of the incumbent leader of the Council, Cllr Rodney Chambers. Blatantly, the Conservatives think that the safety of poor children matters less than that of those with money and Tory votes. Twydall is a safe Labour ward.

• The promise that the £23 million cuts to the council's budget won't hit front line services. We've all been wondering what a front line service is, as the ConDems keep telling us they're safe. Apparently SureStart isn't a front line service. A real terms cut of £281k in Medway, whilst the Council's freebie, every-house-gets-one-you-can't-opt-out Medway Matters is still produced. In 2010, this cost £116k a year. Its a little less party political since a complaint, which was not upheld, about an interview that told us that Gillingham and Rainham PPC (now MP) Reh Chishti liked Ice Cream, every genre of music and "helping people". But its still a massive waste of money. Its too glossy. Its too expensive. It has to go.
http://www.medway.gov.uk/pdf/med_matters_issue26.pdf (page 29)



• The City Status ASA debacle. Medway Council was told by the Advertising Standards Agency to stop using the term "City of Medway". Rather than take it on the chin, Medway issued the following press release http://www.medway.gov.uk/information/newspages/news/newsarticle.aspx?id=3609 This is perhaps the most embarrassing piece of PR I've ever seen. Its shameful, and Medway's administration is so arrogant, it feels it can even stick two fingers to a respected institution such as the ASA. Face it Medway, you were caught doing wrong. Deal with it. And you question why Milton Keynes City FC are called as much - they don't even exist anymore, you insipid idiots.

Of course, you might not agree with me. If you live in Medway, you have a choice on 5th May. Personally, I think that the Conservatives have become complacent and cocky in how they run our Towns. Time to show them what you think; you have a vote. Use it.

Ten Men 2 - 1 Eleven Men

It was a big day on the north kent coast today. Kirsty and Phil fled the town as Chatham visited desperate for a win with a chance to save their season. Whitstable vs Chatham, one vital league place and three points between them, with ninety minutes to settle it. Whitstable, a great club in the most non patronising sense, fielded two players close to my own heart in Jermaine Darlington, now with the pepper pot hair of a man in his late 30s, and Peter Hawkins. Both were members of the last Wimbledon side I watched in 2001. Both still showed a class well beyond the Ryman League in this match. You'd have thought a 15th minute sending off of a Whitstable player would have made this easy for Chatham, but you'd be wrong. They failed to make the extra man count, with the strikeforce of Kane Rice (finally being played where he might be able to show some of his talents) and Billy Shinners not really getting anything from the extra man. Chatham have lacked a midfield with bite all season, and it showed here. If we'd have had a Matt Solly in the middle and a Lee Barnett up front we might have destroyed Whitstable before the half time whistle. Instead we went in 0-0 with just a scuffed Shinners shot against the post to murmur about. Chatham did dominate without looking menacing in a benign second half, and took the lead when Kane Rice took it upon himself to drift to the wing to at least get a cross in, which whipped over everyone into the Oyster's net. 1-0 Chatham. But we again, not for the first time this season, fell apart at the back, and lost 2-1, their first goal a sublime turn and shot, the second the usual Chatham defensive rubbish we've come to see, Tedder flapping at a ball, and no one dealing with it. The ten men of Whitstable were the better side and embarrassed us to yet another defeat. Paul Foley clearly won't be hear next season. We have, I'm reliably informed, registered 28 players this year who've previously been at VCD. To what end? We're as good as relegated without it happening , the news of two sides resigning from the Southern League meaning, in all probability, that the six 21st placed clubs at this lower end of the pyramid won't go down. We're five adrift of Corinthian Casuals with a dodgy run in to say the least, culminating with Bognor Regis, who have a title to win, on the last day of the season. I'll lay off the obvious calls for managers' heads etc until the fat lady has done the thing that fat ladies do, but let's face it, we're not turning this season around any time soon. What a dismal crock of the proverbial this year was. Can't say I'm fussed to come back this year. What's the point in spending money on something so bad with such an inevitable result? Its like paying to have your cat put down. Twice. Of course, I'll probably go to the remaining home games. With the sick cat. Asking for the kindly vet. And then walking out wondering why I bothered with animal husbandry in the first place. You know what I mean, stop bleating...

All aboard the Foley train!

Calling at thrashing, depressingly predictable defeat, and hopefully, unexpected salvation and hope at Whitstable. I've been meaning to blog for the last week and a bit, but just haven't known what to put. Firstly, the bad news. We're now in the relegation zone. Chatham lost 6-1 at home to Whitehawk on Saturday 26th March. That didn't go down well. Then, midweek, Corinthian Casuals won their last game in hand to go two points clear of us. Then, on Saturday just gone, we played at home to Horsham YMCA. The YM hadn't won away all year. They'd let in 108 goals already. That's three a game people. They were of course going to win, and that they did, one nil. Corinthian Casuals beat play off chasing Ramsgate to run away from us, something that looked a bit unlikely just a month ago. Fortunately, Whitstable Town seem to be doing a good job of making a mess of things too - on the weekend we were beaten 6-1 at home, they lost 6-0 at home to Met Police. They lost 3-0 at Leatherhead on Saturday. And this Saturday, we travel to their Belmont Road ground for what is shaping up to be the most important game for Chatham in years. Defeat could leave us six points off safety with four to play, with no wins in 15 matches. Its not the time to point fingers about the undoubted mess we're in. What we must do is get behind the lads on Saturday, but anything less than an enthusiastic, committed performance from anyone will be frowned upon much so. There's too much at stake. It promises to be dramatic. Let's hope there's no twist in the tale, like a bad nil-all draw. That would probably take the biscuit.